We interrupt this blog to inform you of a late breaking news story. Lisa and Birch, a team on the summer edition of The Amazing Lace, have been dissolved. This reporter has learned that Birch has deserted the team and joined The Biggest Loser instead. Sources close to the story heard Birch complaining about the amount of stitches that she has to lose. Apparently she has decided that she can do this better on her own, without the help of Lisa. Birch was overheard to say, “I have to go from 299 stitches down to 3. I’ve been with Lisa for more than half a year now and she has only helped me lose like 14 stitches. I think that joining The Biggest Loser is the way to go. Summer is coming and you know what that means – beach time, shorts and tank tops. I need to lose the stitches.” When asked if she had any regrets in dissolving the partnership, Birch said that she doesn’t want to burn any bridges, but that she has to look out for what is best for her. “Maybe Lisa and I can get back together in the future, but right now it is time for me to move on and see what I can do on my own.”
Lisa lost no time in choosing another partner, this stylish number that has been recently photographed on the cover of a popular magazine.
“I think that the publicity that is being given to my new partner is only going to help our relationship and that we will be a perfect fit for the summer of 2006 and this episode of The Amazing Lace.” Lisa went on to add that she has no hard feelings towards Birch and that she would consider “rejoining with her in the future. It’s not easy losing stitches and if it isn’t done properly, it can be a disaster. Let Birch try it on her own for a while. I’m not saying I know what’s best, but I think Birch will be back knocking on my door. And of course, I will let her in and help her in whatever way I can. I really love her and want the best for her.”
With this last minute substitution in a teammate, there has been a corresponding change in supplies. Lisa couldn't stop singing the praises of her supplier. "The staff at kpixie has been excellent in getting these supplies airlifted to us in a timely fashion. Now, I can't wait to start working with my new partner. We will soon be sitting down together and spending some time getting to know each other better - things like how tense or relaxed we can be will be discussed."
We will now rejoin your regularly scheduled blog, already in progress.